Undated.

When culture tells us that January 1 is "the time" to start, it's easy to fall into that mindset of starting 1/1, or on "Monday" is the ONLY PATH TO SUCCESS. 

That being said, does anyone else automatically just allow all disciple to fly out the window in December because "I'm starting in January!!"-- or is that just me?

Anyway, the last few years have been especially hard for me to find success in January, despite my best efforts. 

I have experienced 3 losses in January; two of them actually fall on the same day.... double whammy. Even if my brain forgets what day it is, my body remembers the grief, and when I do check the calendar- lo and behold. It all makes sense.

I don't wallow in a dark room in self pity. I'm still a functioning member of society, mostly. I'm just sad, and a lot of my drive goes "bye-bye-bye." (if you sang that, let's be friends)

SO, as I said in a previous post, I'm working on all these things, every day with Jesus. And each year, they get a little better. BUT, and it's a big one- I knew that wasn't what God wanted for me; to live sad all month, looking backwards instead of forward. So I had to be an active participant in my God-given-life and DO SOMETHING small- but mighty- about it. 

I changed my planner. 

For my entire planner-buyin'-life, I've gotten the ones that start in January. If I wanted to change the theme or colors of my planner, or if a dog ate it, I'd get one that started in July and just switch it over. Pretty standard practices. 

Well when all these January's were passing me by, and I was continuing to flop with my goals of sticking to it, I did what I thought would work. I'll buy a prettier planner, because SURELY that'll magically fix my drive and motivation, and my house will clean itself and meals will cook themselves, giving me all the time to use this pretty planner. 

After looking through way too many options, I finally landed on 3 final contenders. Going with the "pretty" standard of measure, I looked at the options. When I landed on a cover that I wanted, I saw that it was, are you ready for this, UN DATED!?!?!

I mean who has the time to fill out EVERY, SINGLE, THING in a planner?! I couldn't find the time to do the priority things. And then it hit me: IF I did get this one, it would arrive in late November 2023 because I'm ordering it mid-November, and I could start using this pretty planner sooner, in December! *<--- this is the start of my breakthrough. 

I order that puppy with a discount they were running for Black Friday, and I get the confirmation email. It's MINE! I couldn't wait!! As I get thinking about it, my brain spiraled into all sorts of off-chute thoughts. By starting in December, that was the month with some (self-induced) pressure to USE the planner attached to it. December is busy for us because of business stuff and birthdays and Christmas, so I AM in my planner more for this. Then it hit me, I'm going to have a MONTH of good habits in before January rolls around! And everything. clicked. 

I didn't have to START in January because that's when the calendar starts. I did it based on what worked for me, though it wasn't clear from the beginning. Fast forward to January 2024. I love my beautiful planner, I'm feeling peace because every appointment, schedule or playdate wasn't LIVING in my brain- it was on paper for me to quick reference, and despite my loss anniversaries that were coming up, I felt COMPLETELY different about January. 

I missed a few days in the planner, but I saw a remarkable improvement in my quality-of-life, and overall I used that thing WAYYYYY more than I have in years past! Aside from learning that starting my planner in months that are "good" for me makes for a lighter mental and emotional load, I also learned that that principle applies to other areas of my life as well:

When I am scheduling an event/appointment, I have to make sure I give myself some buffer time. Sometimes it's minutes or hours before or after, others it's spacing them out with DAYS or WEEKS in between so I don't frazzle myself.

God wants us to live full, abundant lives. SO OFTEN we (I) get frustrated, frazzled, flustered, etc, we lose our peace and joy REAL QUICK, and we say stuff like "the enemy stole my joy!", or "Satan robbed my peace!". 

But that's not the case-- about the enemy TAKING YOUR JOY/PEACE. 

We. Give. It. To. Him.

Yeah, if you're like me, you need to read that last bit again. THEN, some clip from a kid's movie comes to mind. For me it was Shrek 4, when Rumplestiltskin (the enemy in this analogy) tempts Shrek (you and me) to indulge a little.... enjoy doing what HE wants... what he "deserves"... He dangles the carrot of being an ogre for a day- like he USED to be before a wife and kids- if he just signs this contract. What's it cost? Get-a-day, GIVE-a-day, sounds simple enough right? Shrek was SO happy to escape his mundane life, he didn't care WHAT day he gave up. He just told Rumple to make it happen... So the enemy did what he does best; what's right by HIM. 

Rumple took Shrek's birthday, and when his day was up, that was the end of Shrek and his family. Shrek was fuming! I would be too, but when Rumple responded to Shrek's, "you took the day I was born" comment, I had chills. In his deceitful voice, he leans forward and says, "No, Shrek. You GAVE it to me." He was right. Shrek knew it. 

God tells us that our abundant life can't be snatched away if we are in His grip. But that doesn't mean we can't lose it if we GIVE IT AWAY. If the enemy tricks and deceives us into thinking the grass is greener on the other side, how happy is he that not only did we make his job easy by GIVING UP our joy, peace, contentment, whatever- but now he gets to watch us be tormented, too. 

Ultimately, we DO have control of our happiness. When we're over scheduled, or someone cuts you off in traffic. You have 2 choices: 1- bite the carrot the enemy has in front of you and yell and mumble about the situation, or 2- give grace, and find a solution for next time to avoid that feeling.

For me, it was someone as simple as an undated planner, and giving myself buffer time between events. 

What changes, big or small, could YOU make to keep from being tricked by the enemy to GIVE away your joy??

You're the 1 He left the 99 for. That's worth celebrating.