the offensive line
Lately, I've transitioned from quarterback to offensive line. If you don't follow football, or don't know much about the game, the offensive line probably do the most blocking out of any of the players. They stand in front of the quarterback-the guy with the ball- and keep all the opposing team from tackling him and getting the ball. The quarterback throws or hands off the ball in efforts to score and beat the opposing team. Now, in a Christian blog, you're probably thinking that the "offensive line" I am talking about is blocking all the stuff the enemy is throwing at me. You would be wrong. It wasn't until a chilly Monday night in March that the truth hit me like a freight-train-defensive-player-who's-life-depending-on-getting-through-me. Translation- this truth hit me like a ton of bricks.
Without a lot of thought, if I was asked if I was the quarterback or the offensive line, I'd say I was the QB, and God was the offensive line; fighting off the enemy because I'm the one He leaves the 99 for, right? The defense is the enemy and anything he's trying to throw at me. But like I said above, that chilly Monday night, a truth bomb dropped and completely shifted my perspective and allowed me to see who's really playing what position.
God wants me to be the QB, calling shots He's guiding and leading me to. He, Jesus and the HS are the Offensive line- keeping me as safe as He sees fit, and the defense- the enemy- is coming at me HARD.
That truth bomb was that sometimes (more often for me😳), we BLOCK BLESSINGS from God because of our sin, pride, or some other thing. I think time may have stood still in that moment. Picture an "a-ha!" moment meets "oh shoot". I went from blocking the enemy, to blocking God's blessings!??!?!?!?!?!?
*sad sob* call me the destroyer...
Like I said earlier- without thought I NEVER would say that I'm blocking God's blessings. Slowing them down? sure. Redirecting? probably.
But after my mind finished racing/exploding with this newfound self revelation, I knew instantly that I DID NOT LIKE HOW THAT FELT.
I felt:
*slimy
*shame
*guilt
*sad
*like a hypocrite.
I knew that I had to do SOMETHING to be more mindful of how my disobedience wasn't actual keeping me "safe" like I was telling myself. It was straight up building an impenetrable wall that that beautiful blessing really sick to my stomach was when she said something to the effect of: "maybe I'll get that blessing, but maybe I won't. Maybe it's gone forever."
😵💫🤢😵💫🤢😵💫🤢😵💫🤢😵💫🤢 gone?! FOREVER!?
The rabbit hole of 'how many blessings did I block that won't ever come to be?' lasted a few minutes, then reality set in. I am filled with the Holy Spirit, and this fear is NOT my future.
Every day we're faced with fears and struggles, believers and non believers alike. The question is: are we as believers going to find comfort in our disobedience how the world would want? Or do we persevere and see God's plan through?
** Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, -James 1:2
Do you consider your trials with joy in your heart? I sure don't, at least that's not my knee-jerk reaction. I mean that's hard to spit out even on my best day, let alone in the thick of those trials..
And in true God fashion, He gives us verse 3 with the mic drop. Telling us what we know because God's Word is absolute.
** because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. -James 1:3
It's that perseverance that will lead to trusting Him and His plans for us, allowing us to be obedient and step out in faith instead of the head knowledge we so often prefer to use.
My prayer for myself (and you if you've made it this far) is that I can stop playing the Offensive line in this scenario and go back to letting the Trinity block the enemy, rather than me blocking God's blessings. Lord be with us as we're tempted with sunshine and what the world offers. May we remember Bibles read well outside, too, and just because the sun is shining doesn't mean we don't need to let Your light shine. Thank you for the opportunity to even have the faith to be tested!
You are the ONE He left the 99 for. God qualifies the called, and He's equipped you for the things you're avoiding.